I don’t have much to say, so I haven’t been blogging. Not much is happening, in my life. Things are okay, drama free, relatively. I head home in less than a month. I’m all set to visit with my parents, my brother, my sisters in law, my nephews and meet my new niece!

Work is going great. I got put on a challenging, interesting project that is coming together nicely. I’m enjoying the work and I’m busy all day everyday, which makes the days fly by. I can’t stand to be bored. We’re set to move our Corporate office somewhere in the next few months, so that’ll be one more project to manage. Weeee!

I’m trying to make this interesting but… there’s just nothing. My life is kind of plain at the moment. I honestly like it that way. There are good things and bad things, but life is pretty good. I don’t have anything to complain (very loudly) about, no major issues at the moment. I just feel stupid whining about minor things when I know people who are balancing precariously on the edge of sanity. I just keep my issues to myself.

Clearly, it works best that way.

He also has a blog.

I’m trying to be over this  ”Why Can’t a Black Woman Find a Good Man” meme, but something he said in one of his posts kind of struck me:

a man’s greatest fear is not commitment. Instead, his greatest fear is not marrying the woman of his dreams and, in turn, downgrading back into the less powerful and permanent bachelor Clark Kent.

My question, then: so he always has a roving eye? He’s always looking for something ‘better’?

I don’t know that am anyone’s dream woman, really.  It’s kind of depressing that I can’t bring myself to describe me as such. I hate a delusional chick, and me calling myself a man’s dream would be highly delusional.

Does any woman really feel like she is a man’s dream woman? Am I supposed to think that way?

I looked up some reviews of the book– none bad yet. A lot of people said Dr Tartt was able to bring the process down to a simple science. And basically, here’s what I’ve been saying to my “but you have a job and a place to live and a car and you’re self sufficient and men should love that” group of friends:

Newsflash: They don’t care. I mean, they care, just… not as much as you’d think they would. Men care about power, about feeling like the “head” of a relationship, about being needed, about being your man. They care about being visually and physically stimulated and being cared for and taken care of. They care about being made to feel important.

So for all my hard work and being independent,  it doesn’t mean as much as one would think it means. It does score me points in the ‘can handle myself’ and ‘responsible adult’ department.  My friends tell me all the time that they’d date me if they were a man.  I always laugh and say, “not unless you’re a man that thinks like a woman.” Those things I have, that you say make me a good woman, in my opinion only make me a good woman to a woman.

So, I’m trying to look at me from the perspective of a man. I wouldn’t date me. Honestly. Now to figure out why. And to change that.

On the dating front, I was talking to someone kind of nice at a dating site… but two weeks in a row he hinted at meeting up and never followed through with actually setting up a day and time. The second time, we had established a day and a location and then he went radio silent about a time. I haven’t heard from him since about noon, last Friday. *shrug*  I’m done.

I’m waging a war between being open minded, and knowing what I want and what I can deal with. It’s difficult. Kind of messy, inside my head.

So I am attempting to dip my foot into the dating pool again. Attempting. I’ve gone back to online dating because I live in Atlanta and while there are men here, the chances of meeting a single, good one through a friend are pretty slim, at least on its own standing. Sites like Meetup are full of wonderful women… but men– single, eligible, date-able men– typically don’t attend meetup/etc.  events. In order to widen my pool of availability I decided to re-open a closed door.

And when I reopened that door, I got a whiff of what I used to hate about it. The ‘poses with his shirt off, in front of his car’ guy. The ‘I hate women, guy’. The ‘passive aggressive message to all the women on this site that rejected me, because this totally makes me seem like a winner’ guy.

And the ‘moves way too fast before he even knows my name’ guy. I don’t know how to stop this from turning me off but it is an instant dryer-upper for me.

It’s called Online Dating. There’s a process. Online Send Me Your Phone Number Cause You Don’t Feel Like Typing ? I cannot.

I mean… am I the only one this happens to? Yesterday, I got a response from what seemed like a real nice guy. HE  emailed ME. I responded. Then I get maybe two lines in 2 emails. I don’t know this dude, he barely knows my name, he doesn’t know I’m (not) psycho, he gives me his phone number.

What are we supposed to talk about? Invariably, this is how it goes.

Me, calling some dude I don’t know: Hey, how are you? This is [username] from [dating site]
Him: Hey. What’s up?
Me: Nothin’ much. What’s up with you?
Him: Nothin’.
[silence]
Me: So what’s up today, what are you doing? Got any fun plans?
Him: Not really. Just hangin’ out.
[silence]
Me: Oh. Okay. I’m just hangin’ out too. There’s a Criminal Minds marathon on. What kind of shows do you watch?
Him: Little bit of everything. You know. I’m versatile.
[silence]
[silence]
[breathing, yawning, TV blaring in the background]
[silence, while he waits for me to entertain him]
Me: [sigh]. Well…I guess I will go take care of a few things around here. Nice…uhm… talking to you.
Him: Yeah, you too. Feel free to call anytime!
Me: [hangs up] [throws phone across the room] [searches for cats and a rocking chair and a porch on which to place rocking chair online]

I’ve gone through that enough times to know that’s how it’s likely going to pan out. It is painful and annoying. And a severe turn off. I have tried, really hard, to overcome it… I can’t help but feel like it’s really lazy and it makes me feel like I am chasing someone and that’s just something I won’t do.

It seems, yet again, that I’m expected to do an awful lot of work and he gets to sit back in his comfort zone and let the ladies come to him. I don’t wanna do it anymore, bBut it seems like that’s the only response I get.

How do I make it stop?

Please do note that when I try to circumvent having to call the guy, or let them know I’m just not ready to go there yet, I’m dropped like a hot potato. “Too much work” I’m guessing.

MJoy sent me an article, a recurring meme that I’ve seen going around ad nauseum about how it’s been “Black Women Ain’t Sh*t” Year for a few years now. Never in the history of black women have we been so maligned and disrespected and reported on in such a negative fashion. These sorts of reports and articles and blogs perpetuate the idea that the black man is a hot commodity and even if he looks like roasted ass, he might have (or feel like he has) the pick of the litter. These reports have made single, eligible Bachelors feel like a million bucks, so if they don’t wanna work for it……..they don’t have to. The women will come to them. Like I said to MJoy, “I can’t compete.”

In my journey I’ve shared some prime (and by prime I am being very sarcastic) choices with Sarah and Green Eyes. I mean, we all need something to roll our eyes at. Something Sarah said to me, after staring at the latest ad riddled with bad grammar (subject-verb agreement, anyone? Spell check? Buehler?), she noted that some of the ads specify a distinct distaste for black women and openly requested other races. “You know,” she emailed back, “I think you have it harder. I don’t have to worry about the race thing.” I responded to her that I had to find something funny in every encounter because if I did not laugh, I would cry.

This is frustrating and demeaning and my self esteem is taking a beating. We’re about to have a MAN DOWN situation!

The answer, instead of giving some of these dudes a dose of reality and a roundhouse kick to the throat is to lower our standards. Don’t be afraid to date the plumber, the cable installer, the trash man.  He got bills, 2 teeth, no car and lives with his mama? Girl, you better be lucky a black dude wants you! That is a good man! Let me just say, here, that single does not equal eligible. Mkay? Don’t make me pop somebody.

Or… the answer du jour… go outside of our race. Date other races of people. This would be an awesome answer if I lived in a city (and a time) where men of other races were vying to date me. Dating a man that isn’t black seems to be harder– harder to find him, a challenge to keep him without becoming the spokesperson for my race. And really, I love me some Eminem, but I am not looking for a white version of a black guy.  The idea doesn’t scare me.  I’ve dated outside my race, but I moved to Atlanta so that it wouldn’t be the only way I got a date. Ya know? Alas, I did open my profile to all races.  As Green eyes would put it, I’m now down with the swirl. I immediately got some……..savory characters. We’ll see what happens.

I’m frustrated, though. I feel like I am being asked to bend over backward and step completely out of my comfort zone so HE can be comfortable. That’s just wrong. Inside my head, it’s wrong.

It would be so much easier if I just deleted my profile and quit trying.

But my Chocolate Nerd! He’s out there! I know he is!

It kind of doesn’t work like that, though.

It’s more like a series of 5K’s, in between which you have breaks of literally sitting on your behind. That’s where I am. Breaking.

In the past, breaking would have involved eating a ton of crap, gaining back everything I’ve lost, deciding I’m “Happy” being fat and lonely and single and not cute and going on with life and making everyone around me miserable with how obviously miserable I am. This time, I can sense things are different– and not that I’ve never been here before, but it’s still different.

I don’t know what’s up, but I just have zero motivation for working out, anymore. Maybe I’m just burnt out, maybe I’m just lazy. I don’t know. My whole attitude during May and June was that I was going to take advantage of the motivation and energy while it was there, because I know me and this (exercising like a mad woman) isn’t me. Sure enough, about a week into July I hit a freaking brick wall and slid down to the dry earth and that’s where I’ve been laying. Resting.

That’s what I am telling myself. When you’ve run a long time and your sides hurt and you’re cramping and can’t breath and you just need a break, you take one. My break is turning out to be longer than I thought it would be, but I guess it’s where I am and I am loathe to make myself do anything.

My only saving grace and the reason I’ve not ballooned back up to 260 is that my eating has, for the most part, been fine. I’ve had very few off plan days– actually no off plan days. A full off-plan day turns into several. I have an off-plan meal or two– in the last month I count two, which isn’t too bad (for me) at all. It has definitely kept me under 240 (and the horrid 250 number) during this time in which I don’t feel like moving my butt.

Yesterday was the 20th, and I normally do pictures and recap the month. I don’t feel like it. So I guess I will do it at the end of the month. I just don’t feel like looking at myself and trying to find the one inch I lost or the one lb I lost since June 20th. The effort is not worth my time and I don’t want any cheerleading over my halfassedness.

I think what I need to do is go back to my initial motivation of ‘don’t talk about it, be about it.’ I’m always talking about what I’m going to do and not doing it. So, when I am back on my feet, I will just do it. And when I am fully doing it again, I’ll let you guys know.

Thanks for the support!

Many of you don’t know the financial struggles I’ve had in the last… oh… decade. We’ll just say that. It all goes back to my child rearing days, in which we were so poor we really did eat government cheese. We rarely got Christmas presents… money was just so very tight. When I started making my own money, I couldn’t WAIT to buy WHATEVER I wanted… but my parents had other plans for my money. Sometimes I paid the daycare bill. Sometimes I bought things that needed to be bought for the house. Sometimes I could keep it but then my dad was Mr. TakesTheFunOutOfEverything and insisted I save 75% of my paycheck. This was AFTER the 10% tithe to the church.

HMPH!

Like food, I developed a warped and bad relationship with money. It became more than a means to an end… it was the beginning and end to my happiness. Money meant freedom, to me. Still does.

I wish I hoarded money but I didn’t. When I left for college, I forgot all those lessons my dad tried to teach me about money- pay yourself (save), then pay your bills. You don’t need to buy everything you see. Be responsible with your money and don’t spend it all at once. The second I checked into the dorms, all of those lessons flew out of the window.

Yup, I fell into the trap. The credit card trap. It looks so appealing, when they hand you the form. You fill it out, knowing you ain’t got no gotdang money to pay no credit card bills. And miracle…. I was approved! I immediately went out to buy things I wanted and couldn’t buy, things I don’t even own anymore! A TV, a vcr, some clothes. Books, a jacket with my school’s logo on it. All things I later sold for pennies on the dollar– to pay my credit card bill.

After college, I worked one low paying job after another. I wasn’t paying any bills. Collections companies started calling. I started dodging their calls. Every time I moved, I wouldn’t update my address, so the bills would get returned. out of sight, out of mind, right?

My downfall was payday loans. I could walk into a store and borrow against a future paycheck. At only 300% interest! I had no idea what that meant… just give me money. Oh, but the kicker was that on payday, you paid it back. PLUS the fee. And then you were down again. So you turn it around, meaning you pay off loan and immediately take out another loan against your next paycheck. Soon I had 2 and 3 loans out at the same time, just trying to stay afloat. And then one day the bottom fell out. I had borrowed more than I was making and I wasn’t going to be able to pay them all back. When the checks were cashed, my account would be negative and I would have no money to replenish the account. I had to let everything bounce and then pay everything back.

I had no money for anything and my credit hit the toilet. My student loan went into forbearance, and then into default. My car was repossessed. I was thirty years old with the shittiest credit score I’d ever seen. EVER. Like… low 400′s. Low.

I pulled my credit reports. Page after page after page of collections. Delinquencies. Late payments. Shut offs. Charge-offs. It was a nightmare. I was overwhelmed and to be honest, I did nothing for a long time, until I was introduced to Dave Ramsey.

Who I absolutely HATED, the first time I heard him. Over time, he grew on me. His principles began to make sense. You know who he reminded me of, in a kinder, more gentler, less militaristic sense? My dad.  O_o. Turns out that guy was sayin’ something, all those years. Whatever.

So I started doing Dave’s Debt Snowball, where you take your lowest balance and push money toward it, until it’s paid off. And once that’s paid off, you move to the next, and the next and the next until your debt is taken care of.  It took a few years, but I paid off everything outstanding except for my student loan, which I brought out of collections and current in 2006. I have less than 10,000 to pay back, now. I started with nearly 20K. I paid off the Kia in 2008, making double, almost triple payments for a year. I bought a 2007 Camry just last year, something I never thought I’d be able to do.

Within a few months of clearing up some accounts, I was able to open a cell phone account. Couldn’t do that before. I was on metroPCS (prepaid cellular). I tried to open an account with Wachovia when I first arrived in Atlanta. They took one look at my credit history and said, uhm...no ma’am. Embarassed, I slinked out of that bank and have never been back. I had an internet bank account that I opened at ACE Cash Express and had that for a few years. I started using their Bill Pay service– online bill pay changed my life. I swear! I haven’t had a late payment in… years, probably. Literally.

In 2007, I think? I opened my Bank of America account. And an account with Orange. Last year I opened an account with a credit union. Just a few years ago, I couldn’t PAY to get an account open.  I had bounced  ton of checks and had to pay banks back… I was in ChexSystems in perpetuity, it seemed.

My credit score climbed and climed, as I paid things off and got my finances in line. 505. 550. 590. 600 was a milestone for me. I hung out at 630 for more than a year. For so so SO long, every time I checked my score, it would be hanging out in the ‘Bad’ category. “Fewer than X consumers have a score below this number.’

Yeah. Well. They can suck it.

Today one of my friends happened to mention that she checked her score, which reminded me that I hadn’t checked mine in awhile.  I logged into my best friend, EVAR, MyFico.com. Effing love that site. Not free, but I absolutely don’t trust any other site.  I subscribe to the ScoreMonitor, which lets me know when I get an inquiry, when I rise or fall below a certain threshold, when I qualify for a lower interest rate and especially when anything new pops up. I logged in today to see a number I have never seen before. Suffice it to say I am within 20pts of 700. Which… OMG. If I hit 700, I would throw myself a party!

Not only that but as I was paging through the report, I saw this:

My report has never said that before. All of those yellow bars? That ‘good‘? Has never been there before!  I went a little further to the collections tab. I have never been so happy to see this:

“You have no collections.”  I HAVE NEVER SEEN THAT STATEMENT BEFORE.

This… this, today, makes the last 5 years of scrimping and pinching and not doing anything fun, just to pay off bills and get collections and creditors off my back all worth it. I still have one or two things to clear up, but even with those issues, I am just under 700. Thinking back to that day I bit the bullet and ordered my credit report and saw that horrendously low number and wanted to keel over and die, I don’t think I ever thought I’d be here. And I have further to go… but this is great, for me.

*looks at it again* Good? That’s GREAT.

I’m a wee bit emotional, for reasons I haven’t yet uncovered but it is resulting in a lack of desire to work out or blog or… comb my hair… it’ll pass, I am sure. Till then I am holding steady and trying to keep my head above water.

Last night I wasn’t feeling particularly bad, but things have been so pent up, lately. Despite arguing with myself and a few stops and starts, I sought relief in food. I actually enjoyed eating it. I didn’t overeat, though the meal was not even remotely in the same atmosphere as my eating plan. I did not weigh today, and didn’t feel weird about that. I’ll give it a couple of days and, in the meantime, veer myself back toward my plan.

The interesting (or sad, however you take it) thing is that I felt better. I still do. I don’t regret it. Old habits die hard, hm?

Healthy You Check in for : July 13, 2010

Beginning weight: 269

Last week’s weight: 237.8

Today’s numbah:

237.8

Change since last week:  none

Shorty short post today. No change, which is fine. I’ve been rather slack in my working out and I am back to probably not eating enough and eating out too much and not drinking enough water and I am tired. Too tired to dissect and redirect. I am still waiting on MamaNature to bring her  behind on, here. Once that is over I predict a rapid return to my energetic self.

Till the next time!

So, I didn’t work out yesterday. And I don’t feel bad about it. I spent my evening freaking out because I broke something on the internet, then getting it fixed and spending the evening in a fetal position and de-stressing. Everything’s good today.

Tonight I HAD to work out (I’m getting bitchy, which happens when I don’t work out), and it’s approximately 812 degrees outside. Celsius. So I had to work out inside because the other day when it was 98 out, I took a walk. In long pants and long sleeved shirt. I was literally ON FIRE. I know, I’m dumb. Anyway, tonight I did The Firm Fat Burning– the whole 45 minute workout, not just the 25 min cardio part. Good work out, and I did a lot of the dips and lunges, etc at the barre. I can’t find the remote to my DVD player so I can’t advance the Cardio Barre DVD to the chapter that I need, so I play it on my laptop and I’m tired of dragging it around. The Firm is a VHS tape and it was ready to go.

The workout went well… had the fan going so I didn’t get as hot as I would have. I can’t wait until I can do dips and lunges well. My knees just freaking hate them.

I may have misread my GirlyTime tracker. It appears that next week I am ovulating, not expecting a visit. Well, damn. I guess I’m just a moody bitch. *shrug*  Anyone wanna make a baby?

Didn’t think so. I’m off to get some things done. Have a wonderful evening!

Me to GreenEyes: Good News

Me: According to my GirlyTimeTracker, my lil friend should be here next week.

Me: This means that I am a moody bitch and the scale is up a few lbs because I am about to experience Rage Week and not because I’m a moody bitch who eats too much.

Green Eyes: That sucks.

Me: I know. I like to be a bitch on my own. I don’t need a reason.

Oy. I will be happy when this week is over. The older I get, the more I notice PMS symptoms. Thankfully they aren’t that severe.

And also if you know me and I bit your head or ass off, don’t worry, it’ll grow back.

Healthy You Check in for : July 6, 2010

Beginning weight: 269

Last week’s weight: 236.8

Today’s numbah:

237.8

Change since last week:  +1lb

Total Loss: 31.2 lbs!

Check out my chart and my stats at a glance on my Progress page

*grumble*

Boo.

Well, I knew it was coming. And it’s only 1lb. And it’ll be gone in a few days (or so help me God…..). I’m not too worried about it. I’m getting my butt back on the track. I am still down over 30 lbs, I still have fewer than 10lbs to lose to my next mini goal (229) and I still have lots of time before I go home. I just need to hunker down (I have lived in Georgia for too long) and get ‘er did (seriously).

Last week just sucked. Most of it was my fault, so nothing to do but correct, regroup, and move it right along. I’m really enjoying taking up walking again. I love being outdoors!

Got some things to catch up on since we were out yesterday, so I’m off like a prom dress! Have a great day!

I don’t know. I just really dislike when I am unhappy with my life for no apparent reason. Having a little trouble keeping my eyes on my own paper.

Anyway, I went for a walk today, which was great.  A nice 45 minute one, too. I wanted it to be an hour, but I was dragging on the way back and just wanted to get home. Much of it was uphill and I didn’t even really feel it, so WIN! That felt pretty good, actually.

I’m eating nice and clean today, drinking my water. Weigh in tomorrow. I’ll be fine if I stay the same. Has been a rough week, eating-wise. Got kind of lazy and started to fall back into the eating out trap. I still haven’t grocery shopped. I guess I have my to-do for tomorrow. I had some more fraud issues on my bank account so going anywhere without a debit card sucks.

So happy I had today off. Was nice to have some extra time to relax. Hope everyone enjoyed the 4th!

See you all for Healthy You tomorrow!

Scheduled day of rest, exercise wise, though I’m not sure I deserve it since I had 2 days off last week already, but whatever. I am off tomorrow and am likely to do a long walk and a Cardio Barre session. I have to eat clean all day tomorrow, since I have a weigh in Tuesday which may or may not go all that well.

I didn’t make any plans for the 4th. Which meant I didn’t have any cookouts to go to. Nor did I go to the store and buy anything to eat. I’m a genius. So I decided to pop by my favorite grilled chicken place. I got some chicken, some pinto beans (fiber, baby) and some steamed vegetables.

And then I stopped at the convenience store for something to drink, where I was accosted by some items that were not on plan. And I decided to buy them and eat them. I have no idea why.

I don’t know why I get so militant about not having donuts on Fridays at work, and not having french fries and not eating things that aren’t on the list of things I’m intaking right now, but catch me at the right moment in time and I will wolf down something that is the complete opposite of what I should be eating. It wasn’t a full on binge, but let’s face it… I don’t have those anymore. I can’t be excusing myself for these mini binges, simply because I didn’t eat an entire pizza, followed by a hotdog, followed by an entire pint of ice cream. And a diet pepsi. These mini binges are just as damaging as the big ones. Maybe more, because I am constantly excusing them.

So, yes I am kind of angry with myself. I think I have put so much pressure on myself to be at a certain number or size or goal by the time I go home that everything in me is rebelling. I am up on the scale, I don’t feel like working out and I am eating crap. Seems like self sabotage. Maybe I don’t think I can do it, and so I am subconsciously showing myself that I can’t. Maybe it’s me smacking myself in the face for getting all uber confident about my 30 lbs lost. Forgetting that I have to lose 30 lbs THREE MORE TIMES before I make my goal.

My work is not done. I’ve hardly done anything in comparison to what I have left to do. Best not get to feeling like I can coast. There’s nothing but a sliver of accomplishment to coast on.

Back to work.

I woke up early this morning, as is my normal for a day when I don’t have to be anywhere by 8am. On the days when I have to go to work, the alarm is just barely enough to arouse me from sleep.  Anyway, I took advantage of the cool, early morning to take a walk, about a mile or so. Then came home and did my Cardio Barre workout. I skipped my walk yesterday– I like to work out before I eat and I was so hungry that I went ahead and had dinner. And then I got lazy, so I chose not to work out. All night, I kept reminding myself that I have a goal I am trying to hit… so I woke up this morning and got it in good, burning about 318 calories. It’ll do.

I have lunch plans today, so I washed my hair and now I am sitting under my hair dryer:

Except that’s not the bonnet I have. I’m using this one:

Sexy, huh? I know!

I still haven’t measured :gulp: I actually don’t even remember where I put the tape measure I just bought. I don’t know why I have such an aversion to it. I just… don’t want to do it. I don’t know. I am odd.

I spent most of my week a few lbs up, even climbing to 239, but as of today am back down to my Tuesday weight. Exercise seems to make a big difference for me. My days off were not much help at all, so it’s good to be back on routine. And it’s good that I can take a few days off and pick it back up!

I’m loving that it’s a long weekend! Weekends are my time to be selfish and spend time on ME. I’m on a mission. I will succeed.

I hope everyone is having a fabulously healthy day, and if you celebrate Independence Day, Happy 4th!

So I guess I’ll post something from an exhibit that I wish would come to Atlanta. It is the Tim Burton exhibit that was at the Museum of Modern Art. I found out way too late that it was in NYC, otherwise I might have tried to go. I had to settle for pics tweeted from friends who went. This is one of the drawings that I liked the most.

Tim Burton. Untitled (Cartoons). 1980–86. Pencil on paper, 13 x 16” (33 x 40.6 cm). Private collection. © 2010 Tim Burton

That cupid looks kind of evil. Love most certainly hurts.

Do you have a favorite art piece, artist, drawing, sculpture! Share!

Oh, and HAPPY FRIDAY of a THREE DAY WEEKEND!

Welcome to July! Weeee! *waves sparklers around, sets off a cherry bomb*

As you know by now, I like to change my activity up every month so I don’t get bored. In May, I walked every single day. All 31 days. In June I did the 30Day Shred.

I did my Inagural workout this evening, a Cardio Barre session. I didn’t even turn it off when he got to abs. Go me! (I hate ab work and I hate anything done on the floor) Dang, that is a workout! Normally I can count on sweat beading up on my forehead, but when it starts to drip down my neck and onto my chest, I know I’m really working. That workout totally does it for me.  For those who have no idea what the hell I am talking about, here’s a sample:

In about six years, I’ll be able to make it look that easy.

I think I will alternate workouts in between this one. It’s pretty rough on my knees and there is a lot of work on one leg, and then other. Though my legs are getting stronger, my supporting leg is always pretty damned angry with me by the time we get through four 8-counts. I will alternate either a nice, long walk or The Firm. Likely a walk, because I’ve been missing the opportunity to get out of the house and listen to some music.

Eating will stay the same. Not gonna fix what ain’t broken. Still doing great on high fiber, no white flour, no starch, no sugar. I am ready to try adding in some low glycemic fruit like berries, in a bit. I’m not counting calories, or carbs, but I know what I should and shouldn’t be eating and there’s plenty of meats and green veggies and whole grains available for the eatin’.

I’m quite proud of myself today– I intended to pop by El Pollo loco and get some chicken. I was IN the drive thru lane…. I pulled out before I got to the speaker, came home, and made myself something simple and proteiny for lunch. And then went back to work. I cannot fall back into the ‘eating out every meal’ trap again. It’s much harder for me to lose when i don’t cook my own food.

I am gonna chill with something light for dinner and enjoy the rest of my evening. Have some blogs to catch up on and maybe I will get to some writing this evening. I also need to measure, may do that first thing in the am.

Here’s to a great month!